He couldn't quite describe the feeling—just that the sight of her crying unsettled him completely. Ji Shuhe said nothing, just sat there silently shedding tears, and his heart felt like a crumpled tissue, both sour and pained, unable to stop feeling for her.
He wanted to make her stop crying, to wipe away her tears, to reach out and hug her, to tell her that he actually understood.
Wen Shaoyu pulled out another tissue, carefully wiped two of Ji Shuhe's tears, then stiffly shoved the tissue into her hand.
He hesitated greatly, but finally reached out and gently wrapped his arms around her.
It was a comforting hug. Wen Shaoyu tried his best to make himself more like Ji Shulang, but Ji Shuhe, overwhelmed by emotion, didn't seem to care. She cried even louder on his shoulder.
Wen Shaoyu didn't hold tightly; it was more like he lent her a shoulder: "Alright, wipe your tears. The wind is strong in winter. Crying like this, after the wind blows, your heart might not hurt, but your face will."
Ji Shuhe didn't even lift her head: "Wen Shaoyu, you're so annoying!"
Scolded again, but Wen Shaoyu laughed softly.
Ji Shuhe's ears turned red from the vibration of the boy's chest as he laughed. Realizing who she was hugging, she felt dazed about how they had ended up like this.
But this embrace was too warm. Even his clothes smelled of sunshine. She was reluctant to leave.
"Ji Shuhe, I don't know why you came to Xinhai, but you need to realize that not all parents love their children unconditionally. Maybe they love themselves more than they love their kids."
"You've probably heard about my situation." In a calm, declarative tone, Wen Shaoyu continued without waiting for her answer. "I have nothing to say about my biological father. Let me tell you about me and Granny."
"When my mother passed, the one who couldn't move on was my grandmother. She lost her only daughter, lost everything she cared about most. So even though she took me in out of a sense of blood ties, her feelings toward me were lukewarm. We never grew close."
Wen Shaoyu twitched the corner of his mouth, but found he couldn't lift it, so he gave up: "Actually, I can understand her. Because she is herself, she has no obligation to unconditionally transfer the love she had for her daughter onto me. I think... maybe your parents are the same."
"Ji Shuhe, have you noticed? People should love themselves more. Don't force yourself to please others. Be a little more selfish, and you won't get hurt. Understand?"
Wen Shaoyu's tone was unusually serious. Ji Shuhe slowly pulled back from his embrace, looked into his eyes, and her brow gradually furrowed.
She understood, but she just couldn't do it.
Ji Shuhe struggled softly: "But this year, Granny Zheng celebrated your birthday. Your relationship has been getting better, hasn't it?"
Ji Shuhe's choice to change the subject didn't surprise Wen Shaoyu much. He shook his head to himself, sighing that this girl was hopeless.
Yes, starting from this year's birthday, after a night of talking, the grandmother and grandson had finally broken through the familial estrangement. But Wen Shaoyu felt his situation was different from Ji Shuhe's. He had never compromised, never bought a second-rate familial affection by sacrificing himself and pleasing others.
This was different from Ji Shuhe's way of behaving, from what she was agonizing over.
But now was not the right time to argue with a girl whose eyes were swollen from crying. Even though they had been together for a while, there were still times he had no idea how to deal with this stubborn little sprout.
"Right."
The frustration of trying to be a good person but failing choked him. Wen Shaoyu deliberately teased her: "On my birthday, Granny said that next year when I turn eighteen, I'll be an adult. She wants to invite friends and neighbors to a restaurant. Ji Shuhe, you absolutely must stay until then, got it?"
Next year's birthday was still far off. Ji Shuhe thought she wouldn't promise anything now.
But... judging by the current situation, as long as the alley wasn't scheduled for demolition before his birthday next year, she should still have the chance to mooch off that meal.
As night deepened, the streets that had been quiet during dinner became lively. More strolling pedestrians appeared in the small park. Lizi, who had been obediently guarding Ji Shuhe, occasionally perked his ears, stood up to look around, then sat down again, continuing his role as a little dog security guard.
Wen Shaoyu waited patiently. When he felt Ji Shuhe had adjusted her emotions enough, he bent down to put the leash back on Lizi: "Done crying? Can we go home now?"
"Mhm." Ji Shuhe rubbed her eyes, took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. Aside from her eyes still being swollen, everything else seemed fine. "Let's go home."
She stood up, stuffed the tissues into her coat pocket, and reached for her backpack straps to put it on. But the bag suddenly felt lighter, and in an instant, it was in someone else's hands.
"I'll carry it for you. You walk Lizi." Wen Shaoyu slung Ji Shuhe's pink-gray backpack over his shoulder, and also picked up the bags beside them. "Come on, it's cold. Let's hurry home."
He was tall and moved fast, barely giving Ji Shuhe a chance to protest before his long legs were already striding away.
Ji Shuhe stood frozen in place, watching Wen Shaoyu's shadow grow farther and farther away, stretched long by the streetlight.
The wind blew the nearly leafless branches, and a few remaining withered leaves from the plane tree fluttered down. One fell unmistakably onto Ji Shuhe's heart.
She was so absorbed in thought that Wen Shaoyu, having walked a bit without her, suddenly stopped and turned around. Seeing her dazed, he asked in confusion, "What are you thinking?"
"Nothing!" Ji Shuhe snapped back, tightened the leash, and ended up being pulled along by Lizi at a trot, barely catching up to Wen Shaoyu.
They walked side by side. Wen Shaoyu had already gotten used to slowing down.
"What's in this big bag? It's pretty heavy."
"It's trendy Thai takeout I packed for my brother. It tasted good. Want to come eat it as a midnight snack?"
"..."
"No thanks. Let him eat more. He's at the age where he needs to grow a brain."
"Wen Shaoyu!"
"Fine, fine. I won't say anything about him, okay?"
Author's Note:
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[Please] I think I caught the flu. My throat is dry and itchy, and my forehead hurts! But no stuffy nose or fever. I hope it's just a dislike for going to work [bursts into tears]
It's Friday! Everyone, have a happy weekend and take care of your health. Don't miss us at the Yong'anli check-in spot [shy]