Uncontrollable.
That winter passed especially quickly.
Wen Shaoyu didn't celebrate his birthday. No one prepared long-life noodles, birthday cake, or a table full of good food for him. His birthday came and went like any ordinary day, without a ripple.
Ji Shuhe, afraid that deliberately acknowledging it would stir up Wen Shaoyu's sadness, only gave him a good-luck charm for academic success, wishing him all the best in his new year.
She had gotten the charm last weekend when she went to the temple with An Qing. An Qing's midterm results hadn't been ideal—especially compared to her sister An Yao—so she couldn't escape their mother's nagging. Determined to do better before finals, she had sworn to find a temple known for granting academic wishes. Her sister looked down on her superstitious behavior, so she had no choice but to drag Ji Shuhe along.
But Ji Shuhe had looked up the temple online, and it wasn't quite what An Qing described. No one mentioned anything about academic success, but everyone said it was good for love.
Ji Shuhe rarely went out, and she happened to run into Ji Shulang on his way to class. When he heard what the two girls were up to, he mocked them, saying they had chosen to burn incense over studying or making progress—a promising future indeed.
Ji Shuhe covered her ears and refused to listen.
Although she didn't believe in it either, she went along for An Qing's sake, thinking that two seniors in the house really could use some luck. Besides, it was a chance to get out and clear her head.
Maybe the temple's specialty wasn't academic, but since it offered related services, there must be a way to communicate. Ji Shuhe firmly believed that, and in one go, she brought home five or six charms.
She gave the academic ones to Wen Shaoyu and Ji Shulang, and the ones for health and safety to the elders. When she pulled them out one by one, she looked like a wholesaler.
Maybe superstition actually worked to some extent. The senior year's first mock exam—a city-wide unified test—was followed by the local spring college entrance exam, and both Wen Shaoyu and Ji Shulang did pretty well.
Wen Shaoyu's scores had fluctuated, but his total ranking was within the top three thousand in the city. Given the upheaval he'd been through recently, that was impressive.
Ji Shulang, on the other hand, overperformed, ranking around the top ten percent—about six thousandth place. If he could maintain this momentum, he might even have a shot at a 211 university. Chu Yue, who had just returned from the parent-teacher conference, was overjoyed.
Ji Shulang still had to go to tutoring, but at least he could breathe a little. The future could wait; for now, what mattered was that he could have a good New Year.
Yes, winter had arrived again. In contrast to the cold, high school classrooms were filled with students in thicker coats, knocking over stacked textbooks as they turned around. The carbon dioxide from breathing accumulated in the sealed, windowless rooms, making everyone drowsier during lectures.
The teachers droned on at the podium, saying that every exam result represented one's positioning, but the students under them only knew that finals meant the holidays were near.
After the spring college entrance exam, the seniors had no more finals. They continued regular classes until the winter break. Since the other grades had their finals a bit earlier, Ji Shuhe ended up with two tutors for free.
Wen Shaoyu sat on her left, explaining problems. Ji Shuhe sat in the middle listening, while Ji Shulang propped his head up on her right, listening to them explain and happy to be a mere ornament.
Ji Shulang, older now, didn't like cramming into his parents' room. He preferred staying at Wen Shaoyu's place, where it was more independent and free. If Chu Yue hadn't rejected his repeated requests to move in with Wen Shaoyu, he'd have gladly slept there.
Chu Yue had her reasons. She was worried that Ji Shulang might use studying as an excuse for something else—there were many possibilities. More importantly, Wen Shaoyu was alone now. Their family helped him out, but they couldn't take advantage of the child.
Wen Shaoyu already had it hard enough; they couldn't let this affect him.
So she knocked on the door a few times to bring fruit, only to find Ji Shuhe there too, and the scene so harmonious that she finally relaxed. Let Ji Shulang stay if he wanted; a little relaxation was fine, as long as he didn't disturb others.
That day, Wen Shaoyu was explaining function problems to Ji Shuhe when Ji Shulang, playing on his phone, suddenly chimed in that his method was better. They went back and forth, and Ji Shuhe's head spun. Just then, her phone, lying face down on the table, vibrated.
Ji Shuhe felt rescued. She escaped from the scene and walked outside. "I'll take this!"
"Go ahead. I'll have a word with him," Ji Shulang waved his hand, grabbed a piece of scratch paper, and insisted on showing Wen Shaoyu his method. When he saw Wen Shaoyu looking out the door, Ji Shulang hooked an arm around his shoulder and pulled him down.
"Why bother about my sister's private matters? Come do the math."
Wen Shaoyu was curious. "Do you know who's calling her?"
"Yeah, I caught a glimpse of the screen," Ji Shulang said without stopping his pen. But after waiting in vain for Wen Shaoyu's follow-up question, he grew irritated and put down the pen. "It's my aunt-in-law..."
He paused, leaned back with the chair, and confirmed that Ji Shuhe was on the phone by the window. Then he sat up straight and lowered his voice. "Technically, my former aunt-in-law. I heard this from my parents. They said Xiao Shu's mom and my uncle have already divorced and sold the house in Yuanjing."
"My uncle wants to keep it from Xiao Shu for now, but I figure once the demolition here is settled, her mom will definitely come to pick her up."
With Ji Shulang's voice masking hers, Ji Shuhe's voice was indistinct even through the thin walls.
Frowning, Wen Shaoyu looked outside again. Ji Shuhe's brows were furrowed just like his.
And he knew too well what that meant.
She was troubled.
"After exams, it's winter break, then the Spring Festival. Last year, Xiao Shu didn't spend it with her mom. This year, who knows? I guess the call is about one of two things: either she's coming to take her for the New Year, or she's saying they can't get together this year either."
Ji Shulang fell silent after that. The mechanical pencil made a rustling sound against the scratch paper, leaving a patch of light gray doodles.
"...I wish Xiao Shu were my real sister."
The room went quiet, and so did the outside. Until a moment later, Ji Shuhe's voice came through clearly.
"...Mom, but I don't want to go to Manchester this winter break."
"Why? Isn't Manchester nice?" Xia Chun, probably not expecting her daughter to refuse, sounded shocked. "Winter break is almost a month until school starts. Your grandparents are in Manchester, and the house is a standalone. It's perfect for you to practice your English. Why don't you want to go?"
"Because..." Ji Shuhe couldn't say the real reason.
Because this winter break, and especially the Spring Festival, would be lonely for someone. Just a year had passed, and everything had changed. Watching others reunite with their families in a house still filled with Granny Zheng's presence would only make him sadder.
Her presence might not make much difference, but not long ago, she had promised that person she wouldn't leave. She didn't want to break her word so soon.
"Because math here in Xinhai is different from Yuanjing. I'm struggling with it, and my recent exam scores haven't been great. My cousin can tutor me over break, so I should make good use of the time."
"Your cousin?" On the screen, Xia Chun squinted in displeasure, her tone turning serious.
Ji Shuhe found the question strange but obediently explained, "My cousin, Ji Shulang. He's a science student. I can ask him anything I don't understand!"
"But I had already planned for you to spend the New Year in Manchester. If you don't come, we won't see each other for months."
"Xiao Shu, you haven't contacted me much lately. Don't you want to see Mom?"
Xia Chun's tone became slow and deliberate, turning from a question to a probe. Even over the phone, Ji Shuhe sensed the danger.